yamaonna

well, another melbourne cup over and done with.  the race that stops the nation, stopped the nation, and now we all drink for the rest of the afternoon.  Makybe Diva won for the third time in a row, which was a pleasant surprise for many many people, and they are hailing it as one of the greatest sporting moments in australian history.  and no doubt it is, given the jockey, the horse, weights and ages etc.  lovely horse she is.

I bet on the following –

I choose Eye Popper becuase he was quite auspicious for me.  Firstly – its a Japanese gelding (what?  my horse has no balls?!?).  The trainer…  or was it owner….  well, he’s name was Fujita, which is part of my ‘japanese name’, and is also the name of Fujita Saitou, 3rd Captain of the Shinsengumi (yeah, i know….  i am not otaku, im am looking at this from a historical point of view).  And thirdly, when i put my mystery bet in, Eye Popper was in that…  so all signs were pointing to good luck for me.  Unfortunatly it didnt even make a place.  oh well.  It was intresting enough having to teach my father how to bet….  something very wrong about that…

only mum won becuase she put $1 to place on every horse…  dont think she’s broken even though.

still, it was very nice to actually sit down and watch the race, and a bit of the lead up.  Oh, and drink a glass of bubbly 🙂  Instead of waiting on tables…  I will most certainly be going to the races some time in the near future!

there have been soooooo many things that i wanted to talk about on my blog over the last two weeks, so not being able to write has been an absolute killer (even if it was self imposed for my own good).  and now, well, of course I cant remember half the things i wanted to talk about. ah, c’est la vie.

today, apart from being halloween, was my first exam – statistical mechanics and nuclear magnetic resonance.  everyone thinks thats a rather scairy name.  neway, the exam went quite well and Im quietly confident that I’ve passed that unit.  Now there is just the photonics exam, and I have 3 full days to prepare, so I should be able to pass.  emphasis on should.

Actually, one thing thats really been on my mind is how much of a difference this is going to be in my life (graduating that is).  I mean, its really not going to be all that different, cause its like Im just going on holidays.  but its like for a very loooooooonnnnnnnnngggggggggggg time….   but i think the thing thats really really getting to me is that for 5 years my life has been defined by me being a university student.  (on a long side note, I have a thing about how we define ourselves, names, occupations, nationality, etc, I find it really intresting after I found out that Xina’s name isnt actually Christina, but that is a name she took on her self……  neway, back to my story)  and now I wont have that structure.  when people I meet say ‘what do you do?’ all I’ll be able to say is ‘work at the airport’.  will have to figure out how to put that in a more positive light…..  But only being able to say i work part time, well, thats like a bit of a step down for me. 

so,  expect there will be changes in how i define myself soon.  Im really going to have to think about things.  (and i think my blog will reflect that).  for one, the title of this blog is going to change….

well, thats enough raving for one day.

xanga is just becoming better and better with all these new options open to ‘classic’ users like me (aka, ppl who wont pay to become premium).  Now I can add my own photos!  yatta!

things have not been good in the past 24hours.  I really dont want to get into why, but my heart is feeling really heavy, and Im doubting again as to wether I will pass overall.  its really hard.  i know its just another week and a half i have to get through, but the only other time i remember uni being this hard was when i got the chicken pox.  and that was a very good reason to feel down.

and there is other stuff going on in my life of couse, but its all on the back burners for now.  i hate living for the future and not now. 

this was sent to me by Liz, its pretty sweet, so I want to share it

SIMPLE FRIEND vs A REAL FRIEND

A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest.
A real friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself.

A simple friend has never seen you cry.
A real friend has shoulders soggy from your tears.

A simple friend doesn’t know your parents’ first names.
A real friend has their phone numbers in his address book.

A simple friend brings a bottle of Pepsi to your party.
A real friend comes early to help you cook and stays late to help you clean.

A simple friend hates it when you call after he has gone to bed.
A real friend asks you why you took so long to call.

A simple friend seeks to talk with you about your problems.
A real friend seeks to help you with your problems.

A simple friend wonders about your romantic history.
A real friend could blackmail you with it.

A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when you have an argument.
A real friend calls you after you had a fight.

A simple friend expects you to always be there for them.
A real friend expects to always be there for you!

Christian also emailed me with great news that He and Junko are expecting!  So Im very happy for them.  Hopefully I’ll get to see them next time im in japan (we havent had much luck on the last few trips)

And Bec, one of the girls from church in japan, has started her own blog – http://blog.goo.ne.jp/bec_crozier278  i always loved getting her monthly updates, so much inspirational stuff happens in her life, almost everytime I read something from her it makes me cry

I’m working more proactivly with one of my 43 things lately – watch every movie anyone asks me if I have watched.  I hired out Hitchhikers, which no one had asked me, but i really did want to see it.  and I hired out Team America, and Princess Bride.  Team America was not quite what i thought it would be, i was expecting more controversial.  however i am walking around saying ‘dukaduka jihad’ far too much…  Will watch Princess Bride tomorrow i think.

And lastly with my good news, My Voltron Collection volume 1 arrived in the mail! yay!  more stuff to watch on the holidays…… 

a lot of ppl can dispute this blog thing….  its the first one I think i have done that is totally opposite to what i actually am.  not that i was drunk the other night….

You’re a Depressed Drunk

You know that distinct taste of tears and vodka real well.

two more assignments to finish.  apparently it shouldnt be too hard for me to pass Lasers and Photonics.  yay.

speaking of…..

okay, before anyone yells at me for doing something other than looking at uni stuff, or editing a chapter for Eden as I said in my last post, this is a reward.  i believe that rewards are a great study tool.  reach your goal, give yourself a treat.  todays goal – i finished the assignment that was due in on friday…..  *blushes*

but I have been very very good with the computer over the weekend!  really, only got on yesterday to check email and download some notes.  but Im not adjusting to this ‘having to study’ thing too well.  i did nothing else yesterday.  except create a killer schedule (killer as in cool, not murderous).  and i did okay trying to stick to it today, out by a couple of hours, but I still have an hour left tonight that i can use. 

so I’d better get to it.

okay, i have a problem.  my internet usage has become really distructive…  very very bad.  and pls keep in mind that i only notice these things tooo late.  So, heres my resolution.  I will not use the internet/computer for any other use than downloading my university notes, and editing two chapters for eden (before exams), and research for this other uni assignment.  so sorry if I dissappear off the net for a while, and not returning emails promptly.

and now, on to passing all my units!

(goodbye cruel cruel internet!)

well, tonight has been overall a good night.  I just really wanted to say that Australia’s funniest home videos has to be one of my favourite tv shows – it never fails to make me laugh.  and I really need that sometimes. 

I also finally got around to entering photos in that Today show photo competition.  They already have something like 40,000 photos, so I dont think my chances are good, but you have to be in it to win it ne?

is it wrong to want a nintendo ds just to play this game  –

kenshin…  kenshin is in it!!!!!  You can play as KENSHIN! *sniffs*

i want my kenshin…….

ohhhh, you can buy a ds for about $180…..

You Are a Silly Hat

Cute, funny, and a little dorky.

ehehehe….  hehehe….  it is kinda true isnt it…..

NEway…

TGIF!  all the way man…..  you have no idea how glad I am that its the weekend.  but i’ll get to that in a minute.  everything is tied in together today, so this entry is probably going to be a little strange/different for me.

What i really really want to talk about is giving up things (and no im not talking about ‘quitting’ something…  although that has a little to do with this….  getting ahead of myself).  Now i know that some of the stuff Im about to talk about makes some ppl a bit iffy, but I want you to know Im not trying to preach or anything, I really really just want to share some of the emotions I’ve been going through lately.  Lately I’ve had to give a lot up to God.  What I mean by that is in order to let go of, for example, stress, anger, bad feelings, you give it to God to take care of.

This last week and a half has truely been horrific.  I’ve had a lot of stress over uni work and physics society stuff, and consequently been quite angry and moody for me (well, I can be moody at times anyway).  Giving up the positions as secretary and editor was a very hard decision and really at the time was a spur of the moment thing, but I really was driven there.  But Ive realized that the decision was for the best.  I really do want the society to succeed, but I personally dont need the stress and bullshit that goes along with all the politics etc.  And it really really was making me angry, and I dont like being angry. 

Now that i dont have that added stress, and that I’ve handed in the three assignments that were due today i really feel like a weight has been lifted off me.  I’ve been asking God all week to take my stress and anger and its really noticable today.  Which, believe me, is such a big relief.  Its not that Im completly stress free, but its managable for now.  And my biggest worry with anger was that today at uni I wouldnt be very ‘friendly’ in actions and feelings towards someone, but you know what – it was totally normal interaction, which was great.

hmmm, I suppose I’d better get back to doing some things that Im supposed to be doing.  ah well, it will be holidays soon, and although between now and then it will be difficult, I think I can manage now.

Your Hair Should Be Orange

Expressive, deep, and one of a kind. You pull off “weird” well – hardly anyone notices.

ehehe

why do people assume that my writing name has capitals.  it kinda bugs me.  its not supposed to have capitals.  I wont tell you the name but I will give you an examlpe.  michelelisa.  its not writing MicheleLisa.  I dont know.  I guess im just fussy.  And I dont like caps.

so, today in the bus, these two guys got on at St Flannans school.  Lets call them ‘bevis and butthead’ (cause when they laughed, that what they sounded like).  so, they take up 2 seats (as you do) on a crowed bus, and persisted to loudly talk about stupid cars (and stuff that I know does not exsist – except maybe in their little try-hard world), pay out this geeky looking guy (yes, he looked like a geek, but he didnt need to be payed out) and persistantly hit my chair (I was infront of one).  Now I remember what I dont like about australia.  idiots like that.  grrrrr.

neway, if you havnt guess Im not in the best mood right now.

suffice to say, I have quit as the physics socitey secretary and editor, and it has left me feeling pretty bitter and angry at the world in general.  *think happy thoughts*  I will not disclose here why, becuase I dont want to be thougth of as petty and childish.

going to see serenity tonight with dad – looking forward to that 🙂